Ask Dr. Linda: Husband Lost Job. Will it impact the kids?

My husband recently lost his job and money is tight. I know I have been more irritable and on edge because of the financial stress we feel. Do kids pick up on this and if so, how do we talk to them about what is happening. Our kids are ages five, seven and nine.

When the economy takes a down turn or jobs are lost, adults get anxious and often pass that anxiety on to their children. So it is important to first deal with your own anxiety. Scripture teaches that God is our provider and will not abandon us in times of difficulty. We are to be anxious about nothing and not worry about tomorrow. This doesn’t mean we pretend things aren’t difficult, but rather that we know the source of our help and strength.

Once you are calm and reassured of God’s provision, talk to your children openly and honestly, but with reassurance and a plan. The most important thing to convey is that they will be taken care of and your family will make it through this difficult time. Make the explanation about tough economic times age-appropriate. Tell your children that daddy is looking for a new job.

In the meantime, you will need to cut back on some of your wants versus needs. For example, we will not eat out as much, be more careful on buying things we don’t need, etc. These changes won’t be forever, but for a while. Younger kids simply need reassurance.  The nine-year-old may ask more questions. If so, talk about job changes and the importance of saving for unpredictable times. This is a wonderful opportunity to build faith and teach about God’s provisions. Children need to know that God promises to be with us and meet our needs. Also, pray as a family, giving thanks for what you do have and making your requests known to God.  Gratitude is a powerful protector against stress. In sum, put your trust in God, make wise decisions and be creative with family fun that doesn’t cost money.